Well, moments anyway. I just had one of those moments... but perhaps it's more to with not having had breakfast than any real resemblance between those two flavours...
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Now playing: Michael Nyman - The Scent Of Love
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Thursday, December 20, 2007
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Death strikes their house
One of the residents in my house committed suicide today.
As I'm not sure who it was, I'm not sure if I knew them.  There are about 40 people living here, and it's easy to go months without seeing some people.
All the same, it felt weird walking into my place tonight after work.  Everything was so quiet, and I thought of spirits and ghosts and things, the spirit of the guy who died and the spirits of people who had lived and died in this area even before the house was here.
I knew something was up earlier today when someone knocked on the caretaker's door (room next to mine).  It was a woman whose voice I hadn't heard before. She was asking the manager's daughter about something.  She mentioned her son in room 14.  I looked at room 14 on my map.  Didn't know who lived there.  Of course I was furiously eavesdropping, because eavesdropping opportunities are pretty scarce in my corridor.  My sister was in my room talking to me at the time, so I didn't catch much of the conversation.  Later on I could hear a fair bit of movement - I remember it was 1.30pm.  My sister had been leaving, but came back to my room and said "Gawain, why are the police here?"  I went outside with her. There were two police officers in the courtyard, and some guy sitting with his back against a wall, and a number of tenants standing around looking dazed.  My first thought was drugs, because I know some of the guys here are into that.  But whatever it was, I didn't feel like knowing then and there, or disturbing people unnecessarily.  I figured I'd find out soon enough.  I just escorted my sister out another way.  I heard what happened later from one of the tenants, who was obviously very shocked.
I guess there's little reason for it to affect me, but it still sounds ominous...someone I live with committed suicide.
Also one of my high school friends, Matthew Roberts, died recently.  The paper said it was sudden but I don't know what happened.  I have many fond memories of Mr. Roberts which won't elaborate on too much now, cos it's late and I'm sick.  I met him in year 7, he was the son of the year level co-ordinator.  He was fun and I went through high school with him.  Hadn't seen him for ages, and then out of the blue, he contacted me via facebook - along with other high school friends.  Unlike other high school mates, though, he wanted to catch up with me.  It was a busy time of year for me and I didn't take too much notice of his invite.  I regret that we had only just started talking again when he passed away, and hadn't had the chance to properly catch up on each other's lives, but I'm happy that we had a chance to speak again at all.  Facebook has its uses.
I feel like Death comes in clumps.  there are passages of time where you don't hear about anyone dying.  And there are times when it seems to be all around you.  That's the way I have experienced it in the past, but then again it's completely unpredictable.  All we can do is hope for the best.
Sleep=Death.  Death=Long Sleep.  Sleeping=Giving In?  Death=Giving In? Live now, Sleep when you are Dead?  or is Sleep merely a Taste of Death?  Acceptance of Death?  Is putting it off merely Putting Off the Inevitable?  What does Acceptance of Inevitable Death achieve?  Realisation and Acceptance of our Path?  or merely Resignation to our Fate? or nothing at all?
Good Night.
As I'm not sure who it was, I'm not sure if I knew them.  There are about 40 people living here, and it's easy to go months without seeing some people.
All the same, it felt weird walking into my place tonight after work.  Everything was so quiet, and I thought of spirits and ghosts and things, the spirit of the guy who died and the spirits of people who had lived and died in this area even before the house was here.
I knew something was up earlier today when someone knocked on the caretaker's door (room next to mine).  It was a woman whose voice I hadn't heard before. She was asking the manager's daughter about something.  She mentioned her son in room 14.  I looked at room 14 on my map.  Didn't know who lived there.  Of course I was furiously eavesdropping, because eavesdropping opportunities are pretty scarce in my corridor.  My sister was in my room talking to me at the time, so I didn't catch much of the conversation.  Later on I could hear a fair bit of movement - I remember it was 1.30pm.  My sister had been leaving, but came back to my room and said "Gawain, why are the police here?"  I went outside with her. There were two police officers in the courtyard, and some guy sitting with his back against a wall, and a number of tenants standing around looking dazed.  My first thought was drugs, because I know some of the guys here are into that.  But whatever it was, I didn't feel like knowing then and there, or disturbing people unnecessarily.  I figured I'd find out soon enough.  I just escorted my sister out another way.  I heard what happened later from one of the tenants, who was obviously very shocked.
I guess there's little reason for it to affect me, but it still sounds ominous...someone I live with committed suicide.
Also one of my high school friends, Matthew Roberts, died recently.  The paper said it was sudden but I don't know what happened.  I have many fond memories of Mr. Roberts which won't elaborate on too much now, cos it's late and I'm sick.  I met him in year 7, he was the son of the year level co-ordinator.  He was fun and I went through high school with him.  Hadn't seen him for ages, and then out of the blue, he contacted me via facebook - along with other high school friends.  Unlike other high school mates, though, he wanted to catch up with me.  It was a busy time of year for me and I didn't take too much notice of his invite.  I regret that we had only just started talking again when he passed away, and hadn't had the chance to properly catch up on each other's lives, but I'm happy that we had a chance to speak again at all.  Facebook has its uses.
I feel like Death comes in clumps.  there are passages of time where you don't hear about anyone dying.  And there are times when it seems to be all around you.  That's the way I have experienced it in the past, but then again it's completely unpredictable.  All we can do is hope for the best.
Sleep=Death.  Death=Long Sleep.  Sleeping=Giving In?  Death=Giving In? Live now, Sleep when you are Dead?  or is Sleep merely a Taste of Death?  Acceptance of Death?  Is putting it off merely Putting Off the Inevitable?  What does Acceptance of Inevitable Death achieve?  Realisation and Acceptance of our Path?  or merely Resignation to our Fate? or nothing at all?
Good Night.
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