Munch

I'm going to miss my house this year. *sigh* I love hammocks...

Ego Time

Hey infidels,

I just got an email from Tickle (web.tickle.com) reminding me that my account was about to be deleted. Yay, I thought. I'm rid of another random site. Looking closer at the email, it appears I took an IQ test on the site, back in July of last year.

Now this test is apparently a "PHD Certified Premium Test", but whatever, that could be marketing bluff to make it sound more credible. All I remember is that it was a HARD test and it had lots of MATHS. Hmm....

What was my result, I wondered. The email said "Visionary Philosopher" but I couldn't remember the exact score. Well if the title of this post hasn't given it away, I am a little proud of my result on that particular test.

"Your IQ score is 140

This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the Classic IQ Test relative to others.

Your Intellectual Type is Visionary Philosopher. This means you are highly intelligent and have a powerful mix of skills and insight that can be applied in a variety of different ways. Like Plato, your exceptional math and verbal skills make you very adept at explaining things to others — and at anticipating and predicting patterns."

Bahaha. I used to be intelligent - before I dropped out of uni! Bahahaha!

...sorry my friends...

I've been wanting to blog for days, but haven't had the time. Still don't, even now.

First things first.

***LIFE UPDATE***
I treated myself on Thursday night. After jamming with my friend Darren, which was fun and to some extent productive, I walked into the city with my sax and took an elevator to the 35th floor of the hotel Sofitel. Here I discovered that the Atrium bar, which I knew had been previously undergoing renovations, was in fact completed and open for the first time that very night. Having nothing to lose and everything to gain, I walked in and was seated at a small table, given a large bowl of complimentary rice crackers and a very elaborate LLB (Lemon Lime Bitters), which ended up costing me $6. So I sat contemplatively at the table, sipping my LLB, writing more of my choir piece and admiring the snatches of fabulous view over the city.

On Sunday arvo it was super windy at the restaurant. We had to stack the outside chairs up so they wouldn't blow away, and the wind strength was intense. In the morning some canoers/rowers had capsized in the Yarra, and spent a while trying to reach the docks. This provided our customers with some light entertainment.

That afternoon I went to see Ben Folds at Hamer Hall playing with the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra. Not only was this a great concert, it was a birthday present, so it was totally free for me. Thankyou Bridget Graham and Andrew Young.
Not content merely with seeing a world-class orchestra and music star performing together, I then somehow found my way to High Street in Northcote for the High Vibes music festival, where I met Sowmiya, Rohan and Trumpet Dave, and a bunch of trippy-looking ravers and stoners, lots of DJs, and lots of pot. We watched the remains of Trojan Horns (now relabelled as Radio Three or something) and they played sweet funky reggae ska.

Yeah and today I rehearsed with the two other people in my trio - each separately. Go figure. And posted my tax form.


Now... onto the next part.

***THOUGHTS UPDATE***
I'm thinking I'm going to ring Telstra tomorrow and tell them I don't want the phone they sent me, because I don't like the plan it's fixed to. But I do want a new phone now. Definitely with a camera.
I'm thinking there are so many people I want to catch up with. So many people I don't have time for.
I'm thinking that half of my workmates are crazy.
I'm thinking that I spend too much time writing about my life and not enough time doing something about it.
I'm thinking that I could never be a Christian, but I'm also thinking that faith is the only solid thing in this world. Maybe that's its problem, that it's not flexible enough, but if everything is in a state of constant change, is it changing to something worthwhile? Is it achieving something worthwhile? Who defines worthwhile anyway?
I'm thinking that I'm working way too much this coming week.


Finally:

***HEALTH UPDATE***
I still have a fungus-type thing on two or three of my fingers which makes them peel. I need to see a chemist for some suggestions.
I should be flossing every day, but I do it about once every two months. But I think my teeth are okay... Haven't seen a dentist in a while... and I probably still need braces.
I know my glasses prescription is out of date because I can't read some things without difficulty. Like, why are fast food menus so far away and hard to read? I'm sure it's not just me who finds them annoying! Anyway sometime soon I better have another eye test.
Lloyd, from work, told me on Sunday that I looked more buff. Hmm I doubt it very much, but all the same, it makes me want to do a couple of push-ups right now. Phew. I can do 15 at the moment. A slight improvement on 10 at the start of the year, but not much.
I think my health is pretty okay. I ate pizza tonight though? ah who cares.


***MUSIC UPDATE***
Not much to say here. I've only been listening to my Not Classical! playlist on iTunes, and haven't been writing much music. However when I played with the members of my trio today I sometimes got a nice sound out of my sax. Maybe I haven't lost all my skills this year.


***HAMSTER UPDATE***
I don't have one!

Scheiße!

Just remembered something I was s'posed to do today... and I'm about to be late for a concert at Trinity, and I don't even know if there are tickets left. Aah crap.
BLUE DA BA DEE! DA BA DIE!!!
;)

Oh! what a beautiful Friday

Bring on the insanity. Working Friday, Saturday and Sunday, with my party Saturday night, so I'll be stuffed by the time the weekend's over.

Love love love. By the Mountain Goats.
(is not what I'm listening to right now. I'm listening to Dub Beautiful Collective, an internet radio station)

Jump Into The Fire

I've been working heaps. And getting pretty exhausted. Which ain't such a good idea, because when I get tired I get depressed. In fact I'm thinking a lot about life and getting older, sometimes in a sad way and sometimes not. I guess my looming 21st has something to do with it, but a lot of it comes from my job too. Working with these people, many of whom are younger than me (although I thought they were all older...) makes me realise once more who the world is made up of. Uni was a welcome break from the secondary school kids, the majority of people in the world, the ones who go into trades and keep the world functioning, the 'mass consumers', the ones who lap up all the ... the stuff which is in the world. The ones who don't seem to search. Not belittling the awesome people I work with now, but just appreciating what I had in college and at uni. Those people were much more LIKE ME. They were intelligent, questioning, crazy and accepting. At work I just sometimes feel like I'm back in primary school again, with the big kids picking on me, unable to say anything. Everything to those sort of people is immediate, very much concerned with what's happening 'at the moment'. The past and the future are vague boundaries, not to be worried about. Of course I don't feel picked on most of the time, otherwise I would have complained. I'm getting used to the joking atmosphere, people pushing each other around and dealing with insults. I don't think I was ever good at that; or maybe I was too good at it. In fact it's just some of the chefs I feel belittled by, whereas at times with the waiters I feel out of place, like I don't belong. Chefs are just bastards though. They're manageable, and they are funny, and incredibly dirty (in the sexual sense). And the waiters may be young out-there party people concerned mostly with the here and now, but they are really nice - naturally this is a prerequisite for a waiter. They're great, and not only that, but they're also intelligent... in a different way. I can't figure it out. They're socially brilliant, of course, and perhaps that's it. To be good at conversation, you have to be able to talk about a variety of things, and that's what makes you intelligent.
Anyway, thinking about who these people are, it makes me kinda despair. On the one hand I want to envy them, for being able to do everything without worrying if it's right or wrong, for not needing to wonder about consequences. And for their worldliness... sometimes I feel so naïve and clueless. On the other hand I'm glad of my uni education and my desire for more of it, and somehow, of what innocence I retain. Ah, and I'm swearing a lot more, just in the last week or so. I have a few different theories as to why, but I'll wait and see how that pans out.

Meh, so. Life continues. Death approaches. DCFC's album 'Plans' has a lot to say about death, and love, and how they combine. It's incredibly intelligent stuff. Thanks Vertigo. ;)

What?

Hi gorgeous people

I bought a CD from Cash Converters the other day - I've been missing it

I heard it so long ago, but forgot it

Two songs on it were worth the $5 alone

"Two Beds And A Coffee Machine"

and

"I Don't Know You Anymore"

The rest are pretty alright

You keep moving on.... and the years go by so fast

Wonder how I ever made it

Beautiful.

  PS check out the link above if you like

  It's my photoblog, with new pics

Left field is behind you!

Dear everyone, tonight I had alcohol! At Naughton's! But I'm in that stage where I feel like I should be drunk but I'm not. Guess I didn't really have that much. music people are so cooool... mostly except that guy who kissed me. On the cheek I should clarify. Well Stuart raped my leg but that's different, that's Stu.
Punctuation be damned! Today consisted of sorting stuff, ah who cares about today? Yesterday I had home-cooked pizza, and a very important and awesome meeting with someone whose birthday it was today (happy bday you!) and I had a relaxing train trip back to Melbourne, unlike some Vline trips I've been on.

OK I feel like saying "Chill!" And also "Pink Sycophant!" The Mars Volta rock. Centrelink suck(s). Shopping tomorrow with my sister. Must rise early, therefore bed early. Goodnight my pretty sobriquets. I don't know what that means, better look it up.... by the way lemmings don't really jump off cliffs, that's a widely perpetuated myth.

bright...early...must be morning

I'm off to work! Gonna be on time this morning, so don't hold me up! Don't stand in my way! I'm off to work, and it's a brand new day!

How cliché.

The Place Of Lost Dreams

Last night I dreamt about trains, and my sister. I think death was involved somewhere - maybe a train blew up. I remember being questioned about it afterwards. We were walking across the tracks towards a fence, or barrier of some kind.

The previous night I had another dream about lots of people trying to escape something inevitable. That's right, everyone was getting on trams and the mood was of hopelessness. I think everyone was already contaminated, or almost dead or something. I had a dog with me and the ground was all muddy. Don't know what the catastrophe was though, might have been a nuclear holocaust or a virus. There were only a few people left and we were waiting for a tram to come and take us ... where? I remember debating which tram route to take.

Maybe I can remember my dreams recently because my sleep pattern is so wrecked. On Saturday I didn't sleep till 7 am, and then last night I stayed in bed for about 11 hours, probably still catching up.

Speaking of sleep....

btw the link is not great, but it did have the number 37 in the URL :)

Hello again dedicated readers,

As music is important to me, and people share their musical tastes with others, I wanted to share with you the playlist I made on Tuesday 4/4/2006. It took damn ages to make, but it was worth it. It's called "Depressed".

In alphabetical order:

Air                                     Playground Love
                                         Ghost Song
Aronas                               Strange People
Arvo Pärt                           Magnificat Antiphonen - VII. O Immanuel
Athlete                              Street Map
Bela Bartok                        Music for Percussion, Strings and Celesta:
                                         1. Andante tranquillo
Ben Folds                           Give Judy My Notice
Ben Folds Five                    Evaporated
Ben Lee                             Apple Candy
                                         I'm Willing
Brad Mehldau                      Exit Music (For A Film)
Clara Schumann                  Geheimes flüstern hier und dort
Claude Debussy                   Images Book I - II. Hommage à Rameau
Coldplay                             See You Soon (from Live DVD)
                                         Careful Where You Stand
                                         What If
                                         Fix You
                                         Swallowed In The Sea
                                         Twisted Logic
Dave Matthews                   Some Devil
                                         An' Another Thing
Diana Krall                         I Can't Give You Anything But Love
Enya                                  Dan Y Dwr
                                         Watermark
Erik Satie                           Gymnopédie No. 1
Felix Mendelssohn               Violin Concerto - Andante (movt 2)
Frank Sinatra                      Don't Worry About Me
Franz Schubert                Die liebe Farbe (from Die Schöne Müllerin)
Gustav Mahler                 Adagietto (excerpt) from Symphony No. 5
Hamish                               Empty - BJ's Gazipur Mix
Henryk Górecki            Symphony of Sorrowful Songs - Lento e largo
Jack Johnson                      Cocoon
Jaga Jazzist                       Going Down
                                         Airborne
                                         Low Battery
Jewel                                Hands
Johannes Brahms                Sonate for violin and piano,
                                         movt. 2 Andante tranquillo
John Cale                           Heartbreak Hotel
                                         Hallelujah
John Corigliano                  Symphony #1: movement 4. Epilogue
J.S. Bach                      Mass in B minor - Credo: 16. Et incarnatus est
Keith Jarrett                      The River
Kurt Elling                         Not While I'm Around
Lord Of The Rings              (Howard Shore) The Great River
Ludvig Norman                  Jordens oro viker (Motett)
Ludwig van Beethoven       Adagio from 'Moonlight' Sonata
Madonna                           Frozen
Massive Attack                   Safe From Harm
                                        Unfinished Sympathy
Maurice Ravel                    Gaspard de la Nuit - Le Gibet
Michael Tippett          A Child Of Our Time
                                 Part I - 1. The world turns on its dark side
                                 Part II - 9. A star rises in mid-winter
                                 Part III - 26. The cold deepens
                                 Part III - 29. I would know my shadow
                                 and my light
Moby                                  Forever
Moulin Rouge                      Ascension
The Mountain Goats            Dinu Lipatti's Bones
                                         Love Love Love
Nina Simone                       Ne me quitte pas (If you go away)
Philip Glass                         Violin Concerto, Part 2
Radiohead                          Pyramid Song
                                         The Tourist
                                         (Nice Dream)
Richard Cheese                   Buddy Holly
Samuel Barber                    Adagio For Strings
Semisonic                           DND
                                         Gone To The Movies
Sibelius                              Valse Triste
Sigur Rós                            Svefn-g-englar
                                         Starálfur
                                         Flugufrelsarinn
                                         Sæglópur
                                         Mílanó
                                         Gong
                                         Andvari
Silverchair                          Miss You Love
                                         Abuse Me
Sixpence None The Richer    Melody Of You
                                         The Lines Of My Earth
                                         I Won't Stay Long
                                         Moving On
Something For Kate            You Only Hide
Sunwrae                            Decipher The Crooked Ways
Toni Braxton                      Unbreak My Heart
Vincent Persichetti             Winter Cantata: So Deep
Vaughan Williams               Tired
                                         Come Love, Come Lord


No guesses as to why I did that. 10 points to whoever said I was depressed! There's a lot of classical music (and instrumental music - Jaga Jazzist, Sunwrae), but the good thing about classical is it doesn't direct your thoughts as much. With solo vocals, you're only permitted to ponder what the vocals are telling you. Classical music allows you to ponder the depths of space and human emotion, and how tiny your brain is in comparison to the scary monstrosity of life.

Having said that, some of the vocal songs were really appropriate.

I Had A Great Time Last Night.

Not only was there a random BBQ at my house, with about 10 ex-Ridleyans, but I went out to a uni friend's 21st. It was full of music students, of course, who are the craziest, most enjoyable humans imaginable. I caught up with a lot of friends I hadn't seen in ages, and met people I didn't know existed. Plus, we sang Happy Birthday in tune! Shock! I think we did at least, I was standing next to the piano so I didn't hear that well. What fun. I like fun. Fun is fun.
My style guru, Val (thanks Val) made sure I looked smashing before I left - long-sleeved black t-shirt under short-sleeved brown shirt, with a trippy striped tie, black pants, and my chequered shoes. Aww yeah.

And this: http://www.whiteninjacomics.com/comics/kindofreads.shtml

So yeah, apparently an asteroid/meteor/meteorite whatever you call it is going to hit the Pacific Ocean late this year. That's what Josh said last night, and why shouldn't I believe him? It could be fun. Hmm, maybe fun's not the right word... interesting. Yeah.

Work work, jobbage jobbage.

Yes folks it's true! For one day only, no two days running, so get in quick before they go, offer ends soon, conditions apply, I've had a job! The word 'traineeship' is not a pretty one, however I will employ it here (pun fully intended). However, $12.83 an hour or not, a job is, as the great Plato himself once said, a job. (No responsibility is taken by the management of this article for misquoting someone who didn't say what they weren't supposed to have been misquoted for not saying, even if they were quoting from another source, which should have been fully referenced in Harvard style anyway.)

Yup, I had my first paid shift (hopefully!) Thu night, then got called back tonight (Fri) for another training shift. You can follow the link above to check out the restaurant itself - it's pretty good-looking, and on the waterfront. A pain to get to though. I was working in the upstairs area tonight, and the view of the city lights was gorgeous. So the trainer, Caitlin, said I was a quick learner and was generally impressed with my efforts, but I did find it pretty hard to remember the entire waiter routine.

Don't forget to greet the customers with a "Hi, how are you? Here is the menu", handing them the menu with the Starters facing upwards, then placing the wine list on the table and indicating "Here is the wine list". You must then mention "Soup of the day is French Onion. Would you like some drinks to begin?" Then there's about 50 different miniscule details about the menu itself to memorise. This may sound quite easy, but while you're smiling at the customers and balancing menus and pen/pad and drinks, and thinking of what you're s'posed to say next, it gets really confusing. I've found I think much better when I'm not looking at people directly, because I focus on what their faces are telling me and not their mouths. Odd how a job can make your brain work just as hard as uni.... almost. Other staff tell me I'll be sick of it soon enough.

Oh well. It's exciting at the moment, and I guess I'll enjoy the novelty while it lasts. Now to get on with the rest of the stuff I'm attempting to do this year...

The Absence Of Laughter

I haven't laughed in ages. That's what I just realised. I mean really laughed. I used to all the time at college, and in the holidays. But this year has been all stress and worry and business. I want childhood back. I want a lot of things back.

"Screw up your life again." - Jebediah

Time alone

In the past few days I've done nothing but think. That's what having nothing much else to do does. However, the housewarming is tonight, so I'll be quick. Gotta do a bit before then. Last night, though, I shared a room with about 200 Indonesian students and a couple of other asians, while watching a couple of karaoke bands and a really great jazz band (Pearly Shells Swing Orchestra). That took my mind off things. It was so good to dance again! I feel so self-conscious most of the time though. I think if I actually learnt some real moves I'd enjoy it a lot more. Whether on my own or with a partner, doesn't matter.

OK, that's enough milk and honey for you today! Bye now. =====> ?

!

And we all went to heaven in a little rowboat.
There was nothing to fear and nothing to doubt.

I Love

A nice song by Athlete. A very good band.

My head is turgid emotion and frantic escape. I can't understand where it all went wrong. It could have been on the beach, it could have been in the fields. My childhood is gone. Somebody please tell me the riddle. I know the answer, but where is the question?

-------------
A lost moment
Dying in the shade
Losing relevance
To the everyday parade

--^--I wrote this poem a year or two ago, in the back of an exercise book.

You may think this all means nothing but it's everything to do with how I feel at the moment. Tonight I felt something really strong. This may have been what we call love, or it may be a few neurons misfiring in my brain. Either way, I'm really tired, and I hate full stops. I'm pretty sure my last post (ha! Last Post!) was a sarcastic reaction to the number of them I use. I want something else to express the end of my sentences, but using more full stops just stretches out what I don't want to say....

Well I hope your brains are in better shape than mine, that's all I can say. I'm confused about what my purpose is. I wrote some cool music using Sibelius, but I can't save it unless I register. Damn!

I find out tomorrow whether I've got a job down at the Docklands! Yippee!! If I don't it might be a blessing in disguise, as it's a long way to travel.

I can't be stuffed I can't be stuffed I can't stuffed be.
go and eat some unhealthy food. see if i care. i'm going to bed.
. I thought this was going to be a post about love. ah well
.
.
.

The Full Stop.

Full stops, or periods. Whatever you want to call them. Aren't they great. They just make the world go round. I love them. The End.

In fact, I shall add a picture of one. So as you know what I'm talking about. This might be stretching it. I wonder if this will work.



They are simply marvellous.

Oh, and you can do this...

Forgotten periods of one's life.

Fear of the Line.

Here, for what it's worth. Facebook is the best way to get in touch with your lost American friends.

My facebook profile.

I'm feeling the strain of a heavy burden. Most of that burden involves my own incredibly harsh emotional state. Harsh/cold/unfeeling, yeah I just wish I could press a button and everything in the world could reset to 'the way it was', or maybe everyone would just UNDERSTAND. Nobody would have to say anything. Sure, we'd lose our voices, but it would be so RELAXING.

Gustav Mahler.

Well my internet has finally been connected here, so hooray for that and hooray also for broadband! And hooray for Gustav Mahler. Golly, hooray. Smashing.
Jobs have I none, however now that the internet is here, jobs will I have plenty!
Maybe not plenty. One will suffice.
News. I can't speak French yet. One biscuit can fill you up until dinnertime. Guns make bullets move fast. Cows have interesting digestive systems. I live next door to Alex and Ben. Today we moved a huge dark bookshelf into my room, which solved my Stereo Dilemma. Don't worry about what the Dilemma entailed, concern yourself only that it has been solved. Amen.

And so forth until we all DIE!!!

That was very Goth of me.

Time for another blog, my jollyfish.

In more recent news, I have a house in Melbourne for this year (2006), all my 18 y.o. friends will be in Melb this year, I'm looking for a job (have just today applied for one at Crown), ... something not me-oriented? Come on. Why would you be reading this blog if you didn't want to hear my news.
There was other stuff. It was stressing me out - oh yeah. It's mainly concerned with moving in with 5 people, having to cook and get along, shopping, paying bank fees and not being a student anymore. Yes folks it's a different world out there!!! But I'm gonna be oooookaaaaay.

I hope!


Fish on man, until the next bobbing-for-apples session.

I believe in a world which needs to be saved.


Oh, and I AM taking a year off uni to work and write music. Hopefully this will discourage me from becoming a jobless composer sometime in the future. I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!