I played chess twice tonight. I lost both games. meh. what can I say. The housemates (Ben and James) are good players.
Feel like an empty shell sometimes, a Hollow Man. A shadow of Gawain. Right now, though, I'm fine, which is sadly less dramatic. Either way, my past should sort itself out this year, so there's not much point jinxing it now. If all goes well, it will smoothly transition into my future... assuming I finish uni at the end of this year.
There is so much to decide, now. What am I going to focus on? I don't have a specialisation, as such. No defined career. I've had a couple of job offers... if you could call them that... not including the school last year that wanted me back. It's not money that I'm concerned about, at least not yet. It's making a decision. It's choosing all that stuff in Trainspotting.
Yeah, whatever. or I could just join a band, or the circus, or something. Crawl into a little hole away from the world and just ignore all my ongoing personal issues!~
bah, love. i miss it. :(
breaking up with Mags was tough, but sooner or later I need to journey into my head, into my past, to find out why. What's the deal, Gawain. What what why. Be more constructive with your feedback, why.
exeunt
~~~~
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
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